I Want To Punch The Economy In The Face!

3 02 2009

Ah fuck it, let’s watch some talking babies and regroup tomorrow.





To George Bush

18 01 2009

Or to put it more succinctly

As heartfelt a gesture as I've ever extended to another human being

As heartfelt a gesture as I've ever extended to another human being





Obama Begging Me To Not Vote For Him

10 07 2008

Senator Obama,

I am genuinely disappointed that you chose to support the recent FISA bill.  I and the rest of America have been looking to Democrats, and more particularly you, for strong leadership to stand up to the fascist fear mongering of the Bush administration.  You have failed us.  You could have made a stand and your leadership could have made a difference, but instead you chose to take the politically expedient route.  You sold me and every other American out who believed you were different, and worse you abandoned the Constitution when it needed your protection the most.

This bill was no compromise, it was a cowardly capitulation to an administration that continues to lie and thumb it’s nose at congressional oversight.  So now you reward the most unpopular president in American history and the corporations that colluded with him to break the law and the nation’s trust by giving them a free pass to continue to do so.  It is no surprise that the approval rating of congress is in single digits when all we want is someone to hold this administration accountable.  You have failed miserably.

Unless I hear some strong promises to correct this appalling failure of judgment I will have no choice but to stay home come November because I see no candidate worthy of my vote here.

Respectfully,
Super Jesus

PS: Thanks for making me look like a fool for supporting you in the primary because even Hillary voted against it!





Republican Douchebags “Protecting” Marriage Again

30 06 2008

Remind me again why it is that marriage only needs protecting from the gays around election season?  Oh that’s right, it’s because Republicans have no positive accomplishments to point to so they once again drag out the old dead horse that is the gay marriage ban to get the conservative bigot vote out to the polls.  Like clockwork, but much more cynical…and more gay.

Most of the ten sponsors are pretty predictable but there are two Senators that ooze especially pungent hypocrisy for sponsoring such an amendment: Sens. David Vitter (R-La.) and Larry Craig (R-Idaho).

Jesus’ General made some fantastic ads to help the Republicans promote the effort.

Larry \

David \

Evangelically yours (in a completely heterosexual way),

Super J.





McCain Busts A Policy Move

29 06 2008

Because nothing says presidential like snarling vogue standing.





Call Your Senators, Stop The FISA Amendment!

23 06 2008

The fourth amendment shredding bill that just flew through the House is going to be voted now in the Senate and will be voted on this week.  PLEASE STOP THIS BILL. Call your Senators right now (using this handy phone list) and let them know that you are vocal, you vote, and you’re against this bill.

Then call Senator Obama ((202) 224-2854) because if he would change his mind his leadership could make this happen.





Fuck, George Carlin is Dead

23 06 2008

I was surprised to see the AP has a sense of humor when they posted the notice of George Carlin’s death.

Shit, George Carlin, the motherfucking Grammy-Award winning standup comedian and actor who was hailed for his irreverent social commentary, poignant observations of the absurdities of everyday life, tits, and language, and piss funny groundbreaking routines like “Seven Words You Can Never Use on Television,” died in Los Angeles on Sunday according to his cunt publicist Jeff Abraham. Fuck, that cocksucker was 71.

Brilliant satirist and fanatical defender of free speech. George, you and your honesty will be sorely missed.





Obama FISA Test…FAIL!

20 06 2008

Per Obama’s quotes on the FISA ‘compromise’ on TPM, he says these amendments are “a marked improvement over last year’s Protect America Act.”  He states that “the President’s illegal program of warrantless surveillance will be over.”  Obama then even has the nerve to say that this bill makes “it clear that the President cannot circumvent the law and disregard the civil liberties of the American people.”

Someone let me know if there was another FISA bill that was passed today because Barack apparently isn’t talking about the same bill I read about today.  The one I read about gave telecommunication companies immunity from any laws they might have broken, but of course we will never find out what those might have been once this immunity is granted.

The bill I read about allows for mass and untargeted surveillance of Americans’ communications with no court oversight on the who, what and why of the spying.  Worse yet, in the unlikely event that the court would deny an order for any reason, the government is allowed to continue surveillance throughout the appeals process, thereby rendering the role of the judiciary meaningless.

A court review without power is no court review at all.

So Obama says “I support the compromise, but do so with a firm pledge that as President, I will carefully monitor the program, review the report by the Inspectors General, and work with the Congress to take any additional steps I deem necessary to protect the lives – and the liberty – of the American people.”

Well shit, I feel safer already.  Shame you don’t have the constitutional fortitude to block this Fourth Amendment shredding machine while you still have the chance.  If you had any leadership skills you would rally the Democrats to ram this bill back up the President’s and the Republican party’s collective ass so the Democrats could introduce truly useful FISA reforms in a few months.  I thought you were different but now I see you’re no better than all the other spineless Democratic cowards in the House and Senate.

Change?  I don’t see any fucking change here.





Open Letter To Mr. Obama: My Request For A Congressional Spinal Transplant

20 06 2008

I just received another email plea from you for more of my money.  I understand your situation and I am sympathetic to your challenge.  Alas, we all have challenges these days.  I’ll tell you what, you help me better understand how you’ll protect the tattered remains of the Constitution and I’ll not only make a campaign contribution but I’ll work tirelessly to get my friends and family to do the same.  Fair deal?

So I want to hear specifically is what you’re going to do to block the FISA amendments that the house just rolled over and passed today with nary a Democratic backbone to be seen amidst the spineless leadership.  What chiropractic miracle are you going to perform in the Senate to block this legislation that is such an appalling affront to the Fourth amendment?

And I’m sure you’ve heard it all before, but just in case you need to bone up on why this bill is so much toilet paper chaffing the asses of all Constitution loving Americans, feel free to read this assessment from the ACLU.

My contributions anxiously await an answer.

Regards,
Super Jesus





Call Congress: Vote NO To Telecom Immunity

19 06 2008

AT&T whistle blower Mark Klein succinctly pins down the basics of the snooping allegations the EFF’s pursuing against AT&T in two minutes.

The New York Times has an editorial that nails the issue with more detail but I have paraphrased that article here for your condensed reading pleasure.

The White House and Democratic and Republican leaders on Capitol Hill announced a “compromise” on a domestic spying bill that is decidedly NOT a compromise. The White House and Republicans lap dogs want to keep courts from reviewing the legality of domestic spying programs and to give legal immunity to the telecommunications companies that broke the law by helping Mr. Bush carry out his warrantless wiretapping operation.

The 1978 Foreign Intelligence Surveillance Act, or FISA, requires the government to get a warrant to intercept communications between anyone in this country and anyone outside it. The FISA court has approved all but a small handful of the thousands of warrants requested by the government so anybody claimg the government’s hands are tied is ignorant or lying.  (President Bush, I’m looking at you)

Still, after Sept. 11, 2001, Mr. Bush bypassed the FISA court and authorized the interception of international calls and e-mail messages without a warrant.  Once news about this got out in 2005 Bush falsely claimed that FISA did not allow the United States to act quickly enough to stop terrorists. Not surprisingly that was complete crap because FISA always gave the government the power to listen first and then get a warrant later (up to 48 hours later).

FISA did require a technology update since it required a warrant to eavesdrop on foreign communications that go through American computers, but it was an easy fix.  Unfortunately when Congress made the fix last year, they once again curled into a pathetic fetal position and let the White House add amendments that seriously diluted the courts’ ability to restrain the government from spying on its own citizens.  Typical really.

That law expires on Aug. 3, and Bush is trying to not only get it renewed but to weasel in more spy powers and the telcom immunity.  Obviously given this administration’s refusal to submit to any oversight from courts or congress, lawsuits against the telcoms are the single best hope of finding out the extent of Mr. Bush’s lawless spying.

Alas Democratic leaders in Congress are still craven spineless cowards and have agreed to a phony compromise drafted by the Republican vice chairman of the Intelligence Committee Senator Christopher Bond.  Under this “compromise” the government could tap all communications in the United States without individual warrants or even a showing of probable cause…and it would do so with greatly reduced judicial review.

If Congress cannot pass a clean bill that fixes the one real problem with FISA, it should simply extend the temporary authorization. At a minimum, the House speaker, Nancy Pelosi, and the Senate majority leader, Harry Reid, should oppose FISA expansion and pledge to revisit it next year. If any significant changes are going to be made, they should be made under the next president, Barack Obama.

Please call your Congressional Representative and tell them you want this appalling legislation blocked.  Also encourage the funding of stem cell research so that someday Democratic leaders can get the spinal and testical transplants they so clearly need.