Boom And Bust

27 01 2010

My kind of rap…bitches.

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After Sitting In Chair 8 Months Waiting For A Miracle, Man Not Waiting Anymore

12 12 2009

In South Carolina 550-pound Job Tillman snapped his ACL but couldn’t afford to go to the doctor, so this enormous man of faith did what any normal Glenn Beck fan would do.  He went back to his trailer, stripped naked, covered himself with a blanket, and sat down in his favorite recliner and prayed for God to fix his leg for him.

Yep.  He sat and read his Bible, and ate, and prayed, and posted sermons online, and ate some more, and shat all over himself. Exactly like his savior Glenn Beck does…except he did it for 8 months straight.

The pain eventually became unbearable so his wife called an ambulance.  When the authorities finally came to get him his now 800 pound sore covered feces pustule of a body had merged with his barcalounger and they had to saw the recliner apart (and cut a hole around the front door) to get him out.

Upon arriving at the hospital the doctors were of course surprised to find that Jesus had not gotten around to fixing his ACL.  In fact Christ apparently looked disapprovingly upon him abandoning his faith after only 8 months…so Jesus killed him in the hospital.

True story!

So you might be wondering what’s the moral here?  Surprisingly it is that the Republicans should see this story and realize that they have the most to gain from universal single payer health care reform.

  1. Because $300 could have saved this hard right faith based conservative Republican Sarah Palin vote for the next presidential election, and
  2. I’m guessing that the hospital spent more extracting him from his couch and trailer that it would have cost to fix his leg in the first place.

See, it makes perfect political AND financial sense.  I just don’t understand why the Republicans aren’t out in front of this issue.





Too Big To Fail Redux (or) There Really IS A Regulation Fairy!!!

26 10 2009

If my memory serves me I seem to recall writing a little ramble nearly a year ago that suggested that it should be illegal for any company to become ” too big to fail”.  I might have even suggested if a company deemed “too big to fail” requires government rescue it must  either be divided into two or more smaller economically non-critical corporations or, if breaking it up is impossible, such a super critical company must, obviously, become a part of the federal government.

Well lookee lookee at what the regulation fairy brought us this morning!!

Representative Barney Frank, the chairman of the House Financial Services Committee, would introduce legislation as early as this week. The measure would make it easier for the government to seize control of troubled financial institutions, throw out management, wipe out the shareholders and change the terms of existing loans held by the institution.

Well would you just look at that?!  Kick the Republicans out and a smidgen of common sense regulation takes root 8 months later!  I wonder when the Single Payer Health Care fairy will make her rounds?





Capitalism: A Love Story

23 08 2009

He didn’t pull any punches when he did Sicko so I’m betting this one will sting a little too.  Deal with it.

“It’s a crime story. But it’s also a war story about class warfare. And a vampire movie, with the upper 1 percent feeding off the rest of us. And, of course, it’s also a love story. Only it’s about an abusive relationship.

“It’s not about an individual, like Roger Smith, or a corporation, or even an issue, like health care. This is the big enchilada. This is about the thing that dominates all our lives — the economy. I made this movie as if it was going to be the last movie I was allowed to make.

“It’s a comedy.” — Michael Moore





WSJ Whores And Other Republican Apologists

8 06 2009

I’m no fan of gratuitous violence, especially when it’s handed out in a glaringly one sided broken-bottle-to-the-throat assault.  But every once in a while it can be a thing of complete and utter beauty.   Tonight I beg you to behold the full up to the elbow reaming Matt Taibbi administers to Evan Newmark (WSJ) for suggesting that it is time to declare Hank Paulson “a national hero”.


Can you imagine what a craven, bumlicking ass-goblin you’d have to be to get a job working for the Wall Street Journal, not mention up front that you used to be a Goldman, Sachs managing director, and then write a lengthy article calling your former boss a “national hero” — in the middle of a sweeping financial crisis, one in which half the world is in a panic and the unemployment rate just hit a 25-year high? Behavior like this, you usually don’t see it outside prison trusties who spend their evenings shining the guards’ boots. I can’t even think of a political press secretary who would sink that low. Hank Paulson, a hero? Are you fucking kidding us?

Thanks in large part to Paulson’s leadership in his last years as head of Goldman, the company was so massively over-leveraged that it would have gone under if AIG — which owed Goldman billions when it went into its death spiral last September — had been allowed to collapse. But thanks to Hank Paulson, who heroically stepped in and gave AIG $80 billion the same weekend he allowed one of Goldman’s last key competitors, Lehman, to collapse, Goldman didn’t have to go without that money; $13 billion of the AIG bailout went straight to Goldman. So I guess we have Paulson to thank for the fact that he used about $13 billion of our taxpayer money to essentially bail out his own fuckups. I mean, that’s heroism if I’ve ever seen it. Audie Murphy has nothing on that. Sit your asses back down, Harriet Tubman, Thomas More, Gandhi and Jesus Christ. Hank Paulson is in the house!

I can almost smell the blood on the concrete from here.  Go read it and bask in the glory of a proper (and well deserved) smack down.





Teabagging Jokes Just Never Get Old

16 04 2009

Some Fox News sponsored teabagging protests got a little weird yesterday.

Huh…I bet you didn’t see THAT coming did you?

Fox was beating the drum pretty hard to get their viewers all worked up, meanwhile everyone else just yawned and wondered what all the fuss was about.

Then in Lafayette Square the protest was going to dump a load of teabags there but backed out when they were told they didn’t have a permit. Yeah, because you believe SO much in your protest that you wouldn’t want to get a ticket for littering.  Just more yellow elephants I guess.

Teabags? More like Douche bags.





The Difference Between AIG and GM

16 03 2009

GM and the UAW were forced to renegotiate contracts, but AIG is bound by the letter of the law to pay bonuses to the geniuses who got us in this mess.  To quote Jon Stewart…”FUCK YOU!”

Washington and the nation are enraged that AIG is paying millions in bonuses to retain financial wizards that sold insurance on mortgage backed securities with few assets to back up their promises.

AIG is telling us that it must pay those bonuses, because they are required by employment contracts necessary to retain its financial engineers.

Treasury Secretary Geithner has expressed outrage. Instead, he should be embarrassed.

When the Bush White House agreed to bail out General Motors and Chrysler, it required those companies to renegotiate their labor contracts—that’s right contracts—and they are doing just that to keep their federal largess.

The Obama Treasury, headed by Tim Geithner, is forcing the terms of that deal on the United Autoworkers.

Why did Secretaries Paulson and Geithner not require the same at AIG? Remember Geithner was president of the New York Federal Reserve Bank and a key player when financial giants like Citigroup and AIG were being bailed with the taxpayers’ cash. Those bailouts continue, with easy terms for the bankers and their contracts, on Geithner’s watch.

The threat was the same with AIG and GM. If either shut down, the economy would plummet into chaos and depression we were told.

So Mr. Geithner, instead of being outraged at AIG’s last revelations, perhaps you can explain to all of us why a UAW worker earning $29 dollars an hour must give back wages and benefits to keep their company alive, while the architects of the biggest financial disaster in history get to keep their gold plated contracts.

Mr. Geithner, we are waiting for your answer.

The all new Gitmo weight room is the only bonus AIG executives deserve

The all new Gitmo weight room is the only bonus AIG executives deserve