Our Place In The Universe

18 12 2009

Funny how a little video like this can put things in perspective.  Go for the full screen high-def version, it’s well worth it.





World’s Shortest Books

17 12 2009

I don’t know if the people read their email messages before they forward it on to me, but every so often I get passed on a “funny” email that is especially conservatively partisan/racist.  For example I received one titled “The World’s Shortest Books” that contained these comedic gems:

NEGROS I’VE MET WHILE YACHTING By Tiger Woods

THINGS I LOVE ABOUT MY COUNTRY By Jane Fonda & Cindy Sheehan.
Illustrated by Michael Moore

THINGS I LOVE ABOUT BILL By Hillary Clinton

THINGS I LOVE ABOUT HILLARY By Bill Clinton

You get the idea.  I was sufficiently annoyed so I replied with my own list of World’s Shortest Books that were egregiously omitted from the original list.

HOW TO BE A SUCCESSFUL PRESIDENT (IN ANY WAY SHAPE OR FORM)
By George W. Bush

HUNTING AND GUN SAFETY
By Dick Cheney

MILITARY PLANNING (AND HOW NOT TO CHERRY PICK INTELLIGENCE TO FIT YOUR PREDETERMINED NARRATIVE)
By Donald Rumsfeld

PRESERVING THE CONSTITUTION AND PERSONAL PRIVACY RIGHTS
By Alberto Gonzales

PUBLIC BATHROOM ETIQUETTE
By Larry Craig

HURRICANE RECOVERY AND DISASTER MANAGEMENT
By Micheal “Brownie” Brown

APPROPRIATE BEHAVIOR AROUND CONGRESSIONAL PAGES (OR HOW NOT TO RAPE YOUNG BOYS)
By Mark Foley

FAMILY VALUES (OR HOW TO AVOID BEING CAUGHT WEARING DIAPERS WITH A D.C. MADAM)
By David Vitter

If you have any others I might have missed please feel free to add them to the list in the comments section.





The US Giveth, North Carolina Taketh Away

15 12 2009

It is ironic that on the anniversary of the Bill of Rights, which guarantees the government will “make no law respecting an establishment of religion, or prohibiting the free exercise thereof”,  that we have a story reporting on North Carolina’s law requiring a belief in God.

Who knew that state’s rights included the right to pass unconstitutionally bigoted  laws?





The First Brick In The Wall Separating Church And State…

15 12 2009

…was laid on this date in 1791 when the Bill of Rights to the U.S. Constitution was ratified.

Congress shall make no law respecting an establishment of religion, or prohibiting the free exercise thereof; or abridging the freedom of speech, or of the press; or the right of the people peaceably to assemble, and to petition the Government for a redress of grievances.”

— Article I (First Amendment), Bill of Rights





Not All Wars Are Just, Some Are Just Wars

14 12 2009

Dennis makes too much sense to get any air time or attention from the media.  Here’s my small attempt to remedy that.





America Is Fucked

13 12 2009

When polls show that more Americans believe in guardian angels (55%) than they believe the scientifically established fact that humans are responsible for accelerating global climate change (36%) I think we can extrapolate that America is pretty close to 100% proper fucked.

Honestly, when can we drop prayer from schools and replace it with a mandatory class on critical thinking skills?





Are Scientists Really Faking Global Warming Data?!

13 12 2009

With the recent stealing and release of years worth of private climate scientist emails some have found what they believe to be damning bits of evidence to suggest that scientists are fudging the numbers.  Because the people making these claims apparently cannot be bothered to read (much less comprehend) the context in which such quotes were made I offer you this video that explains the context in which scientists wrote such evidently “deceptive” things.

(Irony spoiler, the scientists are not the ones being deceptive here)

Of course if you’re a global warming denier I doubt you’ll even take the time to watch a video unless it comes from Fox News.  I had to try though.

(Tip of the thorny crown to Atheist Media Blog)





After Sitting In Chair 8 Months Waiting For A Miracle, Man Not Waiting Anymore

12 12 2009

In South Carolina 550-pound Job Tillman snapped his ACL but couldn’t afford to go to the doctor, so this enormous man of faith did what any normal Glenn Beck fan would do.  He went back to his trailer, stripped naked, covered himself with a blanket, and sat down in his favorite recliner and prayed for God to fix his leg for him.

Yep.  He sat and read his Bible, and ate, and prayed, and posted sermons online, and ate some more, and shat all over himself. Exactly like his savior Glenn Beck does…except he did it for 8 months straight.

The pain eventually became unbearable so his wife called an ambulance.  When the authorities finally came to get him his now 800 pound sore covered feces pustule of a body had merged with his barcalounger and they had to saw the recliner apart (and cut a hole around the front door) to get him out.

Upon arriving at the hospital the doctors were of course surprised to find that Jesus had not gotten around to fixing his ACL.  In fact Christ apparently looked disapprovingly upon him abandoning his faith after only 8 months…so Jesus killed him in the hospital.

True story!

So you might be wondering what’s the moral here?  Surprisingly it is that the Republicans should see this story and realize that they have the most to gain from universal single payer health care reform.

  1. Because $300 could have saved this hard right faith based conservative Republican Sarah Palin vote for the next presidential election, and
  2. I’m guessing that the hospital spent more extracting him from his couch and trailer that it would have cost to fix his leg in the first place.

See, it makes perfect political AND financial sense.  I just don’t understand why the Republicans aren’t out in front of this issue.