Your Urgent Help Needed!

25 09 2008

Dear American:

I need to ask you to support an urgent secret business relationship with a transfer of funds of great magnitude.

I am Ministry of the Treasury of the Republic of America. My country has had crisis that has caused the need for large transfer of funds of $800 billion dollars US. If you would assist me in this transfer, it would be most profitable to you.

I am working with Mr. Phil Gram, lobbyist for UBS, who will be my replacement as Ministry of the Treasury in January. As a Senator, you may know him as the leader of the American banking deregulation movement in the 1990s. This transactin is 100% safe.

This is a matter of great urgency. We need a blank check. We need the funds as quickly as possible. We cannot directly transfer these funds in the names of our close friends because we are constantly under surveillance. My family lawyer advised me that I should look for a reliable and trustworthy person who will act as a next of kin so the funds can be transferred.

Please reply with all of your bank account, IRA and college fund account numbers and those of your children and grandchildren to wallstreetbailout@treasury.gov so that we may transfer your commission for this transaction. After I receive that information, I will respond with detailed information about safeguards that will be used to protect the funds.

Yours Faithfully
Minister of Treasury Paulson

(credit to Angry Bear)

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5 responses

25 09 2008
Minus One

How fucking appropriate…… 🙂

25 09 2008
American 419 : Unquiet Desperation

[…] [via SuperJesus] […]

25 09 2008
burningriver

Absolutely accurate, which means that it’s also thoroughly terrifying. When are we going to start seeing “Bushville” (ie McPalinville, Cheneyville, you name it–referencing the old “Hoovervilles” of the Depression era) tent cities with their bonfires? Honestly, I don’t know which way is up anymore: is it 2008 or 1933?

25 09 2008
Barbara

Free market when all is well….socialism for the rich when it goes bust…..just buy a ticket and ride the gravy train……yummmmm….New: Monday nights on Faux TV….Welfare for the Rich, the Government Bailout

6 10 2008
tara

This is GREAT.

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